I am not one for ‘new year, new me!’ or new year resolutions or anything like that when one year comes to an end and a new one starts. I have always had the mindset that if you want to do something, don’t wait for a new year to do it or try it. There are typically so many ups and downs throughout the year for everyone and especially in the past couple years. We have had great moments and memories in a year while also having had some sad, difficult times in that same year. I try to be realistic but I also always try to be positive and look on the bright side of things because life will always be difficult and will not always be fun so why stress the bad? With that said, a lot has happened in just the last couple months of our lives and that effects a lot of what happens in our day to day lives. I figured a good old fashioned ‘life update’ would suffice even though I’ve never done one of these before! So here goes nothin’.

Our summer was pretty insanely hectic with people trying to get back to normal life and additional weddings or events that had to be packed into weeks from postponed weddings/events in 2020. That meant we either had obligations or I had calligraphy work every single weekend and every night after my full time job. We were looking forward to the holidays where calligraphy work and obligations would let up a little bit. Fast forward to October, and my husband and I found out I was pregnant! The whole ordeal of getting a pregnancy test was actually a funny story that maybe I’ll share one day but the actual finding out for myself was pretty anticlimactic because I had a strong feeling I was pregnant for days prior to the test.

I found out when I was a day shy of 5 weeks pregnant and the first week went smoothly. The following week my first aversion happened at work on Monday morning- coffee is now disgusting and I was so upset when it happened. I never even thought it would be something that I would hate! But I now do. The next day, terrible, all day ‘morning sickness’ (which should just be called all day, horrible nausea and sickness) hit me and wouldn’t leave me until about 16 weeks. I started having daily migraines that would effect my vision, and my nausea was unbearable with nothing settling it. The only thing that would sometimes help would be bagels. There was a time I ate a bagel (sometimes 2!) every single day for weeks. There were even days that it would all start off bad and then somehow get so incredibly worse I would come home from work and just go straight to sleep to stop it from happening. Then other times I would wake up in the middle of the night from intense nausea and still nothing would work to make it go away. I am currently 17 weeks as I write this post and I still have nausea but it can usually be curbed and typically lasts from the morning to the early afternoon and then dissipates. So it is now SO much better than it was but needless to say, the beginning of my pregnancy has been extremely rough. I could rarely even be excited about what we were going through because I felt completely terrible every day.

Before we found out we were pregnant, we wanted to host Thanksgiving so we could have my family and my husband’s family all together. It just so happened that it worked out perfectly to tell them we were expecting during that day! It was very difficult keeping it a secret because of how bad I was feeling and we basically tried to avoid our family for weeks….which is not easy because my parents live down the street and my in laws live about 15 minutes away. Thanksgiving came and we successfully surprised them with the news that they never thought would come true. It was an extremely fun day and we are so happy we filmed their reaction when we told them! It’s a video we will cherish forever.

We decided to get the blood test done for the gender and the basic genetic testing so we found out what we were having pretty early on. We had our parents together and while I was just going to read what the envelope said, my mom made it cute by making cupcakes with blue and pink icing and I grabbed the cupcake to reveal what it was!

The photo above is me at 13 weeks pushing out my stomach to force a bump picture after a run LOL.

A week after we found out the gender, was my birthday, which was a Monday (and Monday birthdays should be illegal by the way). We just did a simple dinner at home and blew out candles with my family then went to bed early like I always do of course LOL. That night (12/14) I was woken up out of a dead sleep at about 1am with the most intense, sharp shooting pain in my lower abdomen. I know a lot of weird things can happen when you are pregnant so I tried to change positions to ease the pain but nothing made it better. I got up and started walking around the house because maybe it was gas pains (again pregnancy is wild) or I had to go to the bathroom. Nothing helped. It was 3 am and the same pain was still constant and never went away. My husband saw I was up and in pain and wanted to make sure I was ok. We were both googling like crazy on our phones and thought maybe it’s round ligament pain (even though I was only just 14 weeks) so I took Tylenol. Still nothing helped. About 4am I started vomiting. The pain began to be extra intense in just my lower right abdomen and I had chills. With all of my symptoms I of course thought this is all appendicitis symptoms but didn’t want to jump to conclusions because again, I’m pregnant and weird things happen. It was about 5am and I literally said to my husband, “I don’t want to be dramatic but I think I have to go to the hospital.” He completely agreed so I called my doctor’s office (which was closed) and I spoke with the on call doctor. They directed me to go to the ER.

I was still throwing up (dry heaving at this point) on the way to and in the ER. Every single bump on the way to the ER was excruciating. I couldn’t take deep breaths. Walking hurt. It was insane and I couldn’t believe it was even happening. I decided to go to Jersey Shore hospital because it was slightly closer than Monmouth Medical where my OBGYN works out of (and where I will give birth) but I had to get somewhere quick. They saw me pretty quickly and I was there all day for testing. All they could determine was that there was fluid in my abdomen around my appendix from and MRI scan and they didn’t know where it was coming from but that was it. Thankfully, the baby was still ok and whatever it was was not effecting him- obviously our first concern was about what the pain was and what it was doing to him. I was sent home with no answers and no solution at about 5pm.

The whole week following, I was still in pain, still didn’t have much of an appetite, and still could barely walk. I couldn’t exercise, walk, or run the entire week and was still waking up multiple times a night, hours at a time from the pain. I saw my doctor on Thursday for her to keep an eye on me and the baby and he was still happy as a clam. Again, thank, God. She mentioned that there were 2 options that she thought it could be, including appendicitis, but the scans that the hospital did showed neither happening which made her extremely frustrated for me.

The following Monday morning came (12/20) and I woke up to try to do some light stretching and PT exercises before work. The pain was now going into my back for days prior but that morning in particular it became horrible that I could barely stand, laying down made it hurt, sitting made it hurt, and even talking made it worse. My husband dropped me off at work because I could barely do anything but wanted to try to tough it out. About 2 hours into work I couldn’t do it. He left work to pick me up and this time we went to the ER at the hospital my OBGYN works out of. I waited 4 hours in the waiting room. I was in so much pain and could not believe how packed the ER was with people coming in with COVID. It was a surreal experience and once again, I couldn’t believe I was even in this situation. Finally when I got called in they immediately gave me fluids, medicine for nausea, blood was drawn, I gave a urine sample, and then they took me to get an ultra sound. That lasted 2 hours. 2 hours of them pushing down on my stomach that was already in so much pain because something wasn’t right. Thankfully, the baby in all of this was STILL doing ok and was healthy! They had to change to the vaginal ultrasound after they couldn’t find my right ovary. With the vaginal ultrasound, they saw what seemed like an issue and took all the images of the area to show the ER doctors and send to my doctor. 

I was wheeled back to my room in the ER and after a few minutes, it became a whirlwind. I was told they found I have an ovarian torsion, that the head doctor of my OBGYN practice was on his way, and I needed immediate emergency surgery to untwist my ovary. They let me know they will also bring the general surgery team in to most likely remove my appendix. I can’t say enough good things about the nurses at Monmouth Medical. They were all so helpful and caring from the moment I got in that room. They funny enough had to take a pregnancy test from the urine sample I gave when I first got in as a pre-surgery protocol so that gave us all a laugh. I had to get a COVID test, changed into a different gown, and then they wheeled me into the pre-op room where I waited for the surgeons and anesthesiologist to come discuss everything with me.

The general surgery team first came in and explained that my appendix was possibly an issue as well so they will take a look while they have me cut open. My OBGYN came in to let me know what happens with an ovarian torsion and that since the torsion causes blood flow to the ovary to stop, there is a possibility that I will lose my ovary. He also told the general surgery team that he expects a 99.99% chance they will need to remove my appendix. The anesthesiologist had to also let me know that a risk of all the surgery could be potentially losing the baby. It was all pretty jarring and I was definitely very scared. I am so, so, so very thankful my husband was able to be by my side, holding my hand for all of this. I got to kiss him before I was rolled out of the pre-op room and into the operating room. 

I woke up out of surgery around 10 or 11pm and all went well. The baby stayed safe and they were able to save my ovary. It was twisted 5 times which they said was unheard of and I did in fact have mild appendicitis and the appendix did not look good so they removed it. I stayed overnight (Steve couldn’t stay with me overnight unfortunately but he need his rest and sleep too!) and I was released a little before noon so he was luckily able to come that morning to bring me clothes and bring me home. And yes, I obviously watched Hallmark Christmas movies in the hospital the morning after the surgery.

I was not prepared at all for how you feel after a laparoscopic surgery. I have 3 incisions. One larger one on my left side of my stomach, one in my belly button, and one on the right side of my stomach. My core strength is essentially gone. I never realized how many small movements you do that require you to use your core until this and never thought that ‘small’ incisions would effect mobility this much. Everywhere you read about laparoscopic surgery it says ‘non invasive’ or ‘simple’ surgery. No matter what, it is a surgery and it is a serious shock to your body. I am 2 weeks post op and still cannot do a lot. My stomach is still insanely swollen, and no that’s not because I’m pregnant- it is all because of the surgery. The photos below show the swelling two or three days after surgery and a week after surgery. It can take months for the swelling to fully go down. Recovery has been tough both physically and mentally. The physical aspect improves little by little every day thankfully and I am determined to still run my half marathon in Disney at the end of February. 

So while we are beyond excited to be expanding our family and I am back on the mend, it has been a lot the past few months. And a lot is a major understatement. I haven’t felt myself since October which I’m sure many moms and moms to be understand is a weird, unsettling, sometimes sad feeling.

This life update was just a glimpse into things that happen behind the scenes that I don’t really discuss outright on social media or on the blog but it is life and as I stated before, it effects a lot that goes on in my life. I am so blessed to fortunately have so many people praying for me and supporting me through it all. I could not have gotten through these past few months without them!